Moma Hicks will be missed.

She always had a smile on her face when I saw her.
You could always see love in here eyes.  And the thing
that made her light up like a Christmas night was
talking about her daughters. She would talk about how
proud she was of them, how each one was developing.
She never beat around the bush with what she meant to
say.  She was a great woman who commanded respect with
everything from her walk the way she contributed to
the world around her.  She was also a warm and
endearing woman from. From her warmest hugs to her
stern glances.  I’ll never forget her, and I know her
legacy will be felt by many generations.  She was that
strong and beautiful. 

Torture

i hear about torture
perpetrated in my name,
i hear about the horrors
mental and physical pains,

my government wont stop
inflicting terror on its enemies,
and that makes me worry
about what if they come for me,

what if i say or do the wrong thing,
what if i write or sing the wrong song,
would they think twice
about torturing me,

am i being hunted, do i have very long
to learn to defend myself, who can help,
is there any way to hide from the eye
in the sky or programs that spy
on what i read, write, and buy,

am i living a lie to think that america
will ever again be sane after this era,
questions outnumber the answers i have,
i look at my nephew and do the math,

he was born the same year
as the world war on terror,
when he has a child will he prepare her
or him to live in a nation whos hate
manifests in brutal interogations and rape,

i have no answers as more questions take shape,
we must be on guard, we must stop this fate

Real Life

do you ever get the idea that your real life is going to begin anytime now? i mean we all have plans, dreams, aspirations. some of us even go so far as to work our asses off to make them come true. but as i look over my own life, and the lives of many people i know, it seems like the life we've been envisioning and working to create still hasn't arrived, that seemingly the plans haven't yet worked. for me personally this is accompanied by occasional bouts of self doubt, and gentle reminders that there are many elements of this dream life i'm working towards that i already have going for me. buut there is this sneaking feeling that perhaps the plan isn't going to ever pan out entirely the way i've envisioned, and maybe i'm missing something here.

Male PMS

There is this phenomenon that many men will never own up to, Male PMS. It's characterized by many of the same things as Female PMS, bouts of irrationality, anger, frustration, strange eating habits, etc. And physiologically speaking it makes perfect sense. We are, as men and people, subjected to the dictates of biorhythms and chemical/hormonal fluctuations, these things occur cyclically and hence shouldn't be that different from women's cycles (except for that whole egg and blood thing).

I'm here to tell you that Male PMS is real and it likely affects every man you know. I'm here saying this not to point the finger at men, but rather to highlight a common occurence of the human condition and to say that we should embrace this and support eachother through it. I don't want any Male PMS support groups or guys around the world to just give eachother a hug when we start acting crazy. No, ideally I would ask that women of the world acknowledge this phenomenon and give their men a little slack when their time of the month starts driving them batty. i don't think that's too much to ask for.

Spy Chips? Nano-Humans?

Spy Chips? Nano-Humans? For Real?
Current mood: confused

Vericorp is a company that has created microchips to implant in you and track everything you do, buy, own, and also can help you open your door, start your car, and much much more. These seem like things out of a sci-fi film, but they are real and they are becoming larger threats to society as we know it. Microchips smaller than a grain of sand that emit radio frequency waves are currently being implanted in everyday products that we purchase, and in people.

The stated purpose of these chips is that they allow tracking and harvesting of information. We are being told they are simply beefed up barcodes. Companies like Verichip and IBM are at the forefront of these technologies and, with the help of huge corporations like Walmart, are aggressively persuing plans to have them invade all of the consumer goods we buy daily as well as implanted into our identification cards and in our very bodies.

Our government in the United States is not turning these efforts back. In fact they are being embraced, for example starting next year all US Passports are going to have these tracking chips inserted into them. While the marketing and spoilage information gathered from such chips would be a major boon to companies using them, the violation of privacy and big brother scenarios are much more frightening. It should not be forgotten that one of the big champions of this technology, IBM, has a history of using tracking systems to manage people and their movements. They did so successfully for Nazi Germany in it's management of the Jewish population designated for extermination.

The question's abound from this technology and it's potential. Do we want to be tracked wherever we are? Do we want companies to know everything we buy, and how long we use it? Do we want to have profiles created and stored of our daily activities? Are we prepared to take the leap from being human beings to becoming nano-humans?

for more information go to www.spychips.com

Sharks With Frickin Laser Beams!

Sharks with friken laser beams!
Category: News and Politics

this is a real article from the Independent of London. Kinda makes you wonder what other kinds of freakish things our tax dollars are going toward....
http://news.independent.co.uk/world/americas/article348700.ece

Pentagon develops brain implants to turn sharks into military spies

By Steve Connor, Science Editor
Published: 02 March 2006

Military scientists in the United States are developing a way of manipulating sharks by remote control to turn them into underwater spies or weapons.

Engineers funded by the Pentagon have created electronic brain implants for fish that they hope will be able to influence the movements of sharks and perhaps even decode what they are sensing.

Although both Cold War superpowers have trained sea mammals such as dolphins and killer whales to carry out quasi-military duties, this is probably the first time the military have seriously considered using fish.

The Pentagon hopes to exploit the ability of sharks to glide quietly through the water, sense delicate electrical gradients and follow chemical trails, according to New Scientist magazine.

"These researchers hope such implants will improve our understanding of how the animals interact with their environment, as well as boosting research into tackling human paralysis," says New Scientist.

But the research also has a military objective. "By remotely guiding sharks' movements, they hope to transform the animals into stealth spies, perhaps capable of following vessels without being spotted," the magazine says.

The neural implants consist of electrodes buried in the fish's brain which can then be triggered by remote control to stimulate specific areas of the animal's central nervous system.

New Scientist says that the project is funded by the US Defence Advanced Research Projects Agency in Arlington, Virginia, which is also involved in a number of other research studies investigating the use of electronic implants to monitor or control the movements or behaviour of animals.

Scientists at Boston University have already developed brain implants that can influence the movements of dogfish - members of the shark family - by "steering" them with a phantom odour.

The electrodes are attached to the region of the dogfish brain associated with scent detection. When the stimulus is to the right side of the olfactory centre the fish turn right, when it is left, the fish swim left.

The stronger the signal, the more sharply it turns.

The shark study is also designed to investigate the possibility of monitoring the brain activity of a shark to decipher different patterns of activity that indicate whether the fish has detected an ocean current, a scent or an electrical field.

Military scientists in the United States are developing a way of manipulating sharks by remote control to turn them into underwater spies or weapons.

Engineers funded by the Pentagon have created electronic brain implants for fish that they hope will be able to influence the movements of sharks and perhaps even decode what they are sensing.

Although both Cold War superpowers have trained sea mammals such as dolphins and killer whales to carry out quasi-military duties, this is probably the first time the military have seriously considered using fish.

The Pentagon hopes to exploit the ability of sharks to glide quietly through the water, sense delicate electrical gradients and follow chemical trails, according to New Scientist magazine.

"These researchers hope such implants will improve our understanding of how the animals interact with their environment, as well as boosting research into tackling human paralysis," says New Scientist.

But the research also has a military objective. "By remotely guiding sharks' movements, they hope to transform the animals into stealth spies, perhaps capable of following vessels without being spotted," the magazine says.

The neural implants consist of electrodes buried in the fish's brain which can then be triggered by remote control to stimulate specific areas of the animal's central nervous system.

New Scientist says that the project is funded by the US Defence Advanced Research Projects Agency in Arlington, Virginia, which is also involved in a number of other research studies investigating the use of electronic implants to monitor or control the movements or behaviour of animals.

Scientists at Boston University have already developed brain implants that can influence the movements of dogfish - members of the shark family - by "steering" them with a phantom odour.

The electrodes are attached to the region of the dogfish brain associated with scent detection. When the stimulus is to the right side of the olfactory centre the fish turn right, when it is left, the fish swim left.

The stronger the signal, the more sharply it turns.

The shark study is also designed to investigate the possibility of monitoring the brain activity of a shark to decipher different patterns of activity that indicate whether the fish has detected an ocean current, a scent or an electrical field.

Getting Older

Getting older (reflections on the doorstep of 30 years)
Current mood: curious

29 is rapidly passing me by and the Dirty 30 is rapidly approaching. and i can tell now more than ever. i'm in bed by eleven at the latest most nights of the week. i get heartburn if i eat to close to bed time. if i move the wrong way my back will lock up. grey hair is popping up all over my head and face. my forehead is getting larger by the year. Wrinkles are becoming more prominent, and i'm just about ready to accept these bags under my eyes as permanent.

but whatever the changes i can see in the mirror i don't feel older. i have as much passion for life as i ever have. my writings have not conformed to the age old addage "today's radicals are tommorows conservatives." but the people i've grown older with that are my age, they seem much older to me. perhaps it's the dead end jobs, wives and children that have taken their toll. perhaps they simply choose to be old.

what does age people? is it stress? is it a lack of dreams and conviction? i don't really know. all i know is that i refuse to get old. that's not to say that i won't age physically or grow wisdom. experience is the best teacher and i'm looking forward to another 30 years of growth. but you better believe i'm gonna be digging for new music, following new artists, researching everything i can, and constantly expanding my social network.

stagnation is the only thing that i truly feel i must gaurd against as the calendar pages continue to flip. wish me good luck.

Why Men Date Crazy Women

why do men date crazy women?
Current mood: crazy

i can only reference from my personal experience. first let me say a word about crazy. according to dictionary.com crazy is defined as:

1. Affected with madness; insane.
2. Informal. Departing from proportion or moderation, especially:
1. Possessed by enthusiasm or excitement: The crowd at the game went crazy.
2. Immoderately fond; infatuated: was crazy about boys.
3. Intensely involved or preoccupied: is crazy about cars and racing.
4. Foolish or impractical; senseless: a crazy scheme for making quick money.

everybody on earth is crazy, we're all just different degrees of crazy. so, in my opinion, we gravitate towards the crazies we're most familiar with, those that reaffirm our own inner crazy.

why do we break up with crazy women and get back together with them? well from time to time we experience a moment of clarity that allows us to see past the crazy and yearn for something better, a different crazy if you will. some of us progress and trade up the crazy chain and some of us remain stationary to simply search for the same crazy in a different woman. then there are those that move onto a different crazy only to realize that what we really want is the crazy that we left behind. so we go back to them.

Story Club

Story Club
Category: Friends

The first rule of story club is you have to tell a story.
The second rule of story club is you have to bring one person with you.

Thank you to everybody that came through and shared stories, you are the reason Story Club is dope. If you missed the first monthly installment of Story Club then you missed out hearing stories about:
-astro traveling
-prison fights
-surviving Hurricane Katrina while in New Orleans
-first time getting high
-a humbeling moment
-getting sick in Costa Rica
-crazy guy begging in a bar
-getting professionaly kidnapped
-and lots more!

so don't be trippin, make sure you get in where you fit in, and that's Story Club. The next story club is Sunday April 9th at 3pm.

living in the projects

i live in the projects,
not the kind you get through HUD,
but the kind that you work through
with sweat and love,
making the deadlines for them or me,
expressing creatively
with the skills i've amassed
as sights i've passed on this road unmapped,
my life is in these projects,
they're what i leave behind,
they allow me to rewind and see
the points that bind the stories
that make up me

work and money

i have so many ideas in my head about work, making money, and the like. and i know that i can make one of my projects pay for my lifestyle and a good one at that. but it seems like i haven't found that right formula yet and i keep getting pulled into 9 to 5 crapy desk jobs that frustrate me and while they pay my bills they take away from the time i want to use on my other projects and with people that i care about. i know it wont always be like this, that i can and will make my projects pay off and pay off well, but it hasn't happened yet and i'm beggining to wonder when it will.

i refuse to lose my dreams to someone elses reality. the biggest supporter of me in everything i do, my grandma, has begun to doubt the solvency of my plans and work telling me that i'll starve to death by doing what i'm doing. that shit hurts for real, but at the same time it makes me dig my heals into what i'm doing even more. nothing makes me set in my ways like someone challenging my ability to succeed. and maybe she knew that and that's why she said what she did. but in the end the only thing that really matters is me standing on my own two feet financially.

here's to wishes, here's to dreams, here's to all those money colored schemes, may the day's be bright and full of cream, may the nights be filled with restful dreams.